The Joy of Limericks!

Happy Monday!  Let’s get the work week off to a humerous start.  When someone mentions “limericks” my minds drifts to the seemy side of the genre (usually not fit to be repeated in public).  However, I ran across a few “cleaner” limericks the other day and thought them worthy of a share.  Enjoy!

There was a young lady named Bright,
Who traveled much faster than light,
She started one day
In the relative way,
And returned on the previous night.

***************

When Daddy and Mum got quite plastered,
And their shame had been thoroughly mastered,
They told their boy, Harry:
‘Son, we never did marry.
But don’t tell the neighbors, you bastard.’

***************

There was an old party of Lyme,
Who married three wives at a time,
When asked ‘Why the third?’
He replied, ‘One’s absurd,
And bigamy, sir, is a crime.’

***************

There was a young man who said ‘Damn!
It appears to me now that I am
Just a being that moves
In predestined grooves,
Not a taxi, or bus, but a tram.’

***************

There was a faith-healer of Deal,
Who said, ‘Although pain isn’t real,
If I sit on a pin
And it punctures my skin,
I dislike what I fancy I feel.’

***************

A young schizophrenic named Struther,
When told of the death of his brother,
Said, ‘Yes, it’s too bad
But I can’t feel too sad —
After all, I still have each other.’

Source: Comic Poems, selected and edited by Peter Washington

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